God-Fuckin-Dammit, I Shouldn't Have Any Trouble Managging This Stuff

Recently, and periodically, I tend to suffer from writer's block...or so I think. The thing is that most of the time I don't know what to write about. For about several weeks allready I've been thinking what to write about. I've pushed people to read what I put here, I 've begged others. And still, until some minutes ago, I had no clue about what to write about.

From where the fuck do I get the nerve to not know what to do in a blog called Movies, Books and Anything Else, from a guy who calls himself Mr. Bitchin? With that kind of background, I can either talk about movies, books or anything fucking else. Anything else. Can it be any more goddamn general? How hard is it to write about anything else.

Worst yet, how hard can it be to bitch about anything else. I've got an array of things to complain about, the world is full of things to complian about, I could even complain about myself. But instead of bitching, I decide to be a bitch (a whinny one at that) who thinks it's to fucking hard to write.

I'm Mothafuckin Mr. Bitchin, I don't have trouble writting. I have trouble getting into a diet, I have trouble paying attention, I have trouble killing my over optimistic, self-fuckin-righteous friends who think their dicks are bigger because they're better players than me in videogames in a regular friday afternoon session of Halo, I have trouble in a lot of shit, doesn't mean I can't do those things.

But writting, writting is my one best abbility, that and getting along with people. So where do I come off having difficulty on writting? What kind of idiot am I not to be able to write on those basis. Anything else, as if I had trouble talking (or for the matter, writting) about anything else, it's ridiculous, it's idiotic, and it's out of the fuckin question.

You wanna hear about anything else, here's something.

You've ever walked down the street or the mall and you suddenly come across a Victoria's Secret outlet, and you're fascinated by the lingerie on display that you turn you're head slightly to see more, but then you turn you're head again as if you weren't interested on the display so nobody walking by you thinks you're some fucking pervert, and then you have notions of you're close relations or anybody that knows you is also in the mall, in a near-by area, and they're taking a look at you, and they're gossiping about you, and then you start to feel really uncomfortable so you're walking faster and you start looking nervous, so now you have the notion that whoever is near by is thinking "Jesus, that guy just went by a Victoria's Secret store and allready he is really worked up, he must be a pervert. Quick, hide the children."

That ever happen to you guys out there? Have you ever been in a situation like this or somehow similar? A cute girl is about to enter the same office building or bar or hotel or any other compound structure that involves at least one door that you're walking out off, or viceversa, so you do the right thing, and you hold the door so she can pass. Suddenly you get the notion that someone, perhaps even she is thinking "Oh, typical. That guy is looking to get laid. Only reason why he acts like that" and you start getting nervous, and you start commiting stupid shit, like bumping on other people, and as they say "watch it asshole" you go "I'm sorry" as little ignorant stutering bitch, and then you let anyone walk over your pride, that ever happened to you?

You're in school and the girl that you have a crush on is over there talking to some dimwitt, and as you approach her trying to start a pleaseant conversation, you set aside waiting for the other jackass to end talking with her, as a gentleman would do. So you wait and you wait, right besides them. And suddenly, to late I might add, you realize that this guy is actually testing his corting skills.

He also wants to get this girl, probbably has the exact same plan as you do, only with a different result. As you realize this, you're struck with the fact that everyone from your class is watching and you might have just commited some stupis ass shit, standing by this couple in process, making you look like the town looser, has this EVER happened to you?

Here's another one, how about them girls out there. I know a lot of pretty smart chicks out there who are equally (or worse) bullied, set aside, made fun off and other practical bullshit all the world's underdogs have to put up with. Has any of this ever happened to you? no, well it sure has happened to me. And I'll be a motherfucking liar if I told you that shit ain't necesary. It builds character, it sets rules.

Who needs the balls-first-fuckin army, Strict parents and all the religion in the world, when all of life's lessons are given exactly by that, life. Has this shit happened to me? you bet you're dicks and tits it has.

Victoria's Secret oultets, more than the lingerie it was the notion of an unapproved behavior. Fuck that, the world out there doesn't give a flying fuck if I google at lingerie or, for that matter, at women. Now, now I know that for a girl to look real sexy all that shit isn't necessary, I mean Keira Knighlty for example. She was in Domino and Pirates of the Caribean. Domino she had short hair, bad girl attitude, and from time to time, verry little clothe. Pirates, long hair, 18th century london-esque clothing, verry good girl attitude (yes I have seen Pirates 2, I know she has a little bad in her, don't fuckin push it).

Same girl, different attitudes, She looks hot. It isn't the clothes that make the woman, it's the woman that makes the woman (yes, I'm corny, Fuck you for minding). But that doesn't mean I'll disapprove thongs (your regular 18 year-old) and for fun, I'll look with undisputed interest at this displays they have on the Victoria's Secret or any other mayor-undermagets retail store. I'll even look at the posters with the flesh and bone models wearing the latest thing in lingerie, and I'll scream to the top of my lungs "HOT DAMMED", "GOOD GOD ALLMIGHTY" and my favorite "JESUS JUMPING FUCKING CHRIST, LOOK AT THE ASS ON THAT ONE" even if there's a pack of kids or nuns or nuns with kids walking by.

As a matter of fact, if said thing does happen, I'll stop the nuns and say "that's right sisters, you heard me. I thank the lord for women, and only that. You go tell him to shove the rest of his creations up his ass. Nothing has ever topped women. And while you're at it, you can also tell him to change the churches politics here and there. For example, gather all the nuns that beneath all that pseudo-pinguin's bitch attire you so proudly wear are still smoking hot, and malke them wear this for a change.

I'll bet 10 out of 10 in just few hours, more people will believe in God and the sanctimonium-whatever-tha-fuck's-next-jerk-me-off-why-thank-you bullshit you people have established as divine law than there ever were on the thousands of years since little jesus sticked it up the man, and eventually got fucked by the people he came to save. Might do you some good too since some of you are starting to look verry lesbianic. Don't think I have a problem with that. Gays and lesbians should have the goddamn right to do as they please.

They ain't hurting anyone, why should we hurt them? So sister, if you feel the need to get inside the store and go Hallelujah with the models, be my guest. I'll even accompany you and we can have a good time as buddys, Huh? Whata you say? Afterwards, we can go outside the mall and pick up chicks. And as for you kids. Girls, you know what drives a real man crazy, the look those young women have up early in the morning just after a few hours of waking up with no make up and no fancy attires.

Just theire faces and that pillow hair and the illusion that they are vulnerable that drives us crazy. Non of that Paris Hilton fake ass shit. We like our women to be curvilineous, more of it, we like them to be real, and by that I mean natural beuty like them hippie chicks, or like Rob Zombbie's girlfriend. Ocassionally, everyone has it's own tastes, I for example think tatoos are sexy, when they're well placed and well thought of. But the most important thing, is a good healthy body.

By that I mean the body of a woman who likes to take care of herself. If you don't have it by the time you're teens, worry not. Evolution is a slow process, but eventually, everyone can be good looking, hell, I know of big ladies whith whom I like to party with. Just don't fall for to much shiny shit, look after yourselves and be healthy. That's all you need to do. Sure this lingerie stuff helps spice things in any relation. But if a guy only wants you to wear this stuff, and only wants you to look a certain way, well fuck him, the dickless bastard.

YES GIRLS, I SAID THE "F" WORD. LEARN TO USE IT WISELY AND NOBODY WILL "F" YOU.

And boys, YOU WORTHLESS PIECES OF SHIT BETTER GROW UP TO BE RESPECTABLE HUMAN BEINGS. DON'T GO AROUND WITH NONE OF THAT MACHO BULLSHIT, DON'T GO AROUND DISAPRECIATING PEOPLE. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, READ NOW AND THEN. DON'T BE AFRAID OF SHOWING LOVE, DON'T BE FUCKING JUDGEMENTAL AND BE FUCKING PROUD JUST TO BE A SENSITIVE GUY."

I also hold the door for as many people as I can, not just cute girls. Sure the notion of getting laid by holding a door open rocks. And I'm pretty sure somewhere out there someone's gotten that for holding a door open. But it's not the only thing on my mind, look at all that I've written so far, and I'm not done. I have a lot 0f shit to think of. Fuck it, who has the time? And you know who is to blame, Corporate Networks. Those are the assholes putting on shows about "VAT IS IT DIKE TO VE A TINAYE" (that's supposed to be red as if you were mentally challenged, retarded for anyone who doesn't have a grundge with political incorrectness).

WHAT THE FUCK DO THIS PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT BEING A TEENAGER? Besides, were are all the ugly people, were are all the poor people. In this shows someone who is poor and ugly most of the time are preatty much normal. So where is the realism? Where are the bad words? Why is there just sexual innuendo, and not just plain kids fucking? I'll tell you why, because it's not HBO, it's just regular ass TV.

Fuck that shit, I want something real. School is all about the people. The real people, and the rest of the jerks who make it look like a fucking sitcom. Yes sex is on our minds, but it doesn't take up all the space of the brain capacity for everyone (I am, of course, refering to some people). So I do hold the door open for everyone. And if there happens to be a cute girl involved, probably I allready flirted with the idea on having sex qith said woman. I don't use the door as means to get laid, I use dating and similar shit to get laid.

Fuck the pretentious bullshit, I am an old fashioned genlteman sometimes, a dirty motherfucker others, and an all around good guy that put's up with a lot of shit. And about the school stuff, yeah I was through that. That shit actually hapened to me, and when it did I couldn't help feeling as if I had been exposed to my classmates. Well, fuck my classmates, I had a crush on that girl. What can I do? I'm a sucker for pretty faces, plus she had a rockin body and a great attitude. So had I been the way I am now, I would've stepped up.

First I would've told the guy "Listen asshole, I got here first, not that the girl in front of you is an object, but I think I've earned the right to speak with her. So excuse me while I frustrate your booty call, I'm sure you won't have trouble finding something to fuck." Then I would turn to the girl and say "I'm a dork and a nerd, noticeably, yes, by social standards I am a looser, but I'm way funnier to hang out with than the average muscle mass and the rest of them playas so, why not give me a try? You've got nothing to loose. It's not like I'll pay more attention to other girls than to you or that one of my friends will try to hit on you. I don't drink or smoke yet I'm fairly open minded, so....wow, this is the longest pick-up line ever, but hey...You're totally worth it...and it's not like I'm a bonafied Romeo."

Now I don't have that crush anymore, cause now I know about more girls who are equally cute, inteligent and fun to be around (if not, more) than this one girl, and I got the time for them. What I don't got the time for is to feel sorry, feel ashamed, feel embarrased. It was three fucking years ago. I have worked my way around any of that shit back then, let alone that, I don't have time to feel regret about anything I've been trough.

Because I'll be damned if I hadn't done some pretty stupid shit in my life. But you know what, fuck it. So fuck any pet peeves you might have and work your way around them. Hey I'm no Hollywood stud, and people still love me. I'm no 1st class student, but I am a smart guy. I'm no model citizen, no good role model and definetly not a hard working person, and I'm still one of the good guys.

SEE YA ON THE FLIP SIDE

P.S.
and start hearing some good music before I break into your cars, houses, and clubs destroying any of this reggaeton shit. That shit really makes me fuckin' angry.

BRING ON THY SAVIOR, THE SHEPPARD OF THE WEAK AND THE MAN WHO COULD BEAT YOUR ASS WHILE HE FONDLES YOUR MAMA OR YOUR SISTER OR YOUR DAUGHTER

Today's post is dedicated to a verry close friend of mine. This guy showed me how to break free from my box, it could show you as well.

Ok kids, now that I've started with The recognition of my blogg, I think it's time we had a conversation about the man, and I mean the real man not some Hokus-Pokus-Conspiracy-Shit about high goverment official running the show. What fucking show? I say, but that comes later, now let me make the proper introducction.

Bow down motherfuckers.....and ladys. This man, he'll rip up you're materialistic, scared, inconfident, unrespectfull, unrelliable, unintelligent, close-fucking-minded brain, wipe his ass with it, make funny impressions with it, throw it to some prairy dogs, scream, beat, scrap, liquify, freeze, heat, pre-heat, wrap, sell, desintosicate, spit, urinate, and defecate on it with the sole purpose of making you a better person. Because somtimes that's what it takes, or at least that's what the bible says (coming from me, a non-believer, that's gotta mean something).

Geroge Dennis Carlin, one of the most influential stand-up comedians of all times, probably the only one still alive today, is one bad motherfucker. With several awards on his belt, being the first "Saturday Night Live" Host, EVER and the title of the second best comedian of all times in Comedy Centrals "100 best Stand-up Comedians of all time" being beaten only by Richard Pryor (RIP) , Mr. Carlin has made quite a legacy with his constant rantings and jokes of great social relevance (can you see the pattern I'm following here?). Sticking it up to anyone, from the guy next door to God, this man is not to be fucked with. The only joke he ever did that (for my taste isn't true) was that anyone with the name Todd is an softy fuck, seeing that I know of three different Todds that prove that joke to be wrong (see, not everyone is perfect, which just makes him even better). His impression in my life is of such magnitude, that even though I knew it, I had forgotten that my screen name, Brain Droppings, is in fact the name of his first book. Which brings us to todays reason of posting.

Just great, I mean just great. Listen, if you're one of the thousands of ball-scratching mongoloids that don't like to read...wait a minute, that wouldn't make sense because you're reading this. Ok, If you know any ball-scratchig, Football-fannatic, cheese enthusiast mongoloid that doesn't like to read anything that doesn't involves tits and the women that beare them with the uttermost pride because they're huge, then a death threat is in order. You people read this first, and then make those assholes get up of theire asses, that would probbaly have allready been welded to the couch, and tell them to read this, it will at least be an incentive for them to grow past the mental age of a 3 year-old with the ecceptional horniness. Now he would certainly kick Chuck Norris's ass. Here, let me give you a taste of Mr. Carlin's humor.

+When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

+Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

+Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.

+Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

+I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

+May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

+Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

+If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

+Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

+I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

+At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.

+The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

+Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

+I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

+The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.

+Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll go to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!

SEE YA ON THA FLIP SIDE