BRING ON THY SAVIOR, THE SHEPPARD OF THE WEAK AND THE MAN WHO COULD BEAT YOUR ASS WHILE HE FONDLES YOUR MAMA OR YOUR SISTER OR YOUR DAUGHTER

Today's post is dedicated to a verry close friend of mine. This guy showed me how to break free from my box, it could show you as well.

Ok kids, now that I've started with The recognition of my blogg, I think it's time we had a conversation about the man, and I mean the real man not some Hokus-Pokus-Conspiracy-Shit about high goverment official running the show. What fucking show? I say, but that comes later, now let me make the proper introducction.

Bow down motherfuckers.....and ladys. This man, he'll rip up you're materialistic, scared, inconfident, unrespectfull, unrelliable, unintelligent, close-fucking-minded brain, wipe his ass with it, make funny impressions with it, throw it to some prairy dogs, scream, beat, scrap, liquify, freeze, heat, pre-heat, wrap, sell, desintosicate, spit, urinate, and defecate on it with the sole purpose of making you a better person. Because somtimes that's what it takes, or at least that's what the bible says (coming from me, a non-believer, that's gotta mean something).

Geroge Dennis Carlin, one of the most influential stand-up comedians of all times, probably the only one still alive today, is one bad motherfucker. With several awards on his belt, being the first "Saturday Night Live" Host, EVER and the title of the second best comedian of all times in Comedy Centrals "100 best Stand-up Comedians of all time" being beaten only by Richard Pryor (RIP) , Mr. Carlin has made quite a legacy with his constant rantings and jokes of great social relevance (can you see the pattern I'm following here?). Sticking it up to anyone, from the guy next door to God, this man is not to be fucked with. The only joke he ever did that (for my taste isn't true) was that anyone with the name Todd is an softy fuck, seeing that I know of three different Todds that prove that joke to be wrong (see, not everyone is perfect, which just makes him even better). His impression in my life is of such magnitude, that even though I knew it, I had forgotten that my screen name, Brain Droppings, is in fact the name of his first book. Which brings us to todays reason of posting.

Just great, I mean just great. Listen, if you're one of the thousands of ball-scratching mongoloids that don't like to read...wait a minute, that wouldn't make sense because you're reading this. Ok, If you know any ball-scratchig, Football-fannatic, cheese enthusiast mongoloid that doesn't like to read anything that doesn't involves tits and the women that beare them with the uttermost pride because they're huge, then a death threat is in order. You people read this first, and then make those assholes get up of theire asses, that would probbaly have allready been welded to the couch, and tell them to read this, it will at least be an incentive for them to grow past the mental age of a 3 year-old with the ecceptional horniness. Now he would certainly kick Chuck Norris's ass. Here, let me give you a taste of Mr. Carlin's humor.

+When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

+Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

+Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.

+Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

+I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

+May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

+Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

+If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

+Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

+I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

+At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.

+The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

+Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

+I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

+The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.

+Religion convinced the world that there's an invisible man in the sky who watches everything you do. And there's 10 things he doesn't want you to do or else you'll go to a burning place with a lake of fire until the end of eternity. But he loves you! ...And he needs money! He's all powerful, but he can't handle money!

SEE YA ON THA FLIP SIDE